The Sex Pitfall, Stabilizing Hormonal Agents and the Mind

As I had my morning coffee, the "Dear Abby" column caught my eye. A reader wrote in with a dating predicament and ended her letter with that often-heard stereotype that "Women utilize sex to get love, and men utilize love to obtain sex." This is a terrific summation of the "Sex Trap."

The Sex Trap resembles the Love Trap, where songs analyze great sex as love. But those who fall into the Sex Trap go even further due to the fact that for these songs, having sex brings tremendous significance and repercussions.

Songs fall under the Sex Trap in one (or both) of two methods:

A.they believe sex is a necessary test of compatibility, (if the sex is excellent then the relationship will be great too).

B.more typically, all consciousness goes out the window, and one or both previously level-headed singles consider themselves a dedicated couple as quickly as they have sex.
Rather than looking at whether this other individual might be a match on levels other than physical attraction-- such as long-lasting requirements, requirements, and desires-- they are blind-sided by the chemistry under the covers.

No doubt, it can be challenging to stay connected with reality when all those hormones are cutting loose. Our body responds to somebody we are brought in to by producing hormones such as PEA or phenylethylamine (natural amphetamine), dopamine and norepinephrine (natural state of mind enhancers), and testosterone (increases libido), which makes the chance to have sex with someone we are drawn in to incredibly difficult to withstand. Then, after orgasm, we produce oxytocin (which acts upon the hypothalamus to produce emotions), makings us feel very close to and bonded with our sex partner.

These chain reactions are uncontrolled and strong , resulting in effective feelings of attraction, enjoyment, closeness, wellness, and love .

When problems emerge, those who fall into the Sex Trap typically rationalize by thinking, "Well, we've got problems, but the sex is excellent!" They more than likely wouldn't confess it, but they focus on physical intimacy and concern the rest as optional. Their primary searching tools are sexual tourist use this link attraction and physical compatibility.

Barry North, an RCI coach who works primarily with gay males, says that much of his clients have actually fallen into the Sex Trap.

" For gay men Oxytocin specifically in metropolitan locations, sex is easily available, and that in itself is a trap," North states. "In addition, the culture, with its focus on physical look, encourages sex. If a possible partner is going to be sexually suitable, lots of gay men want to find out from the beginning. Why waste your time if the sex isn't going to ready?".

Nevertheless, North includes, "I suspect this is a 'guy' thing rather than a 'gay' thing.".
I do wish to point out that chemistry is necessary. Chemistry is a offered that we can't manage in a relationship; it is either there or not there, and it needs to be there for the partnership to work. If not there, we cannot "make" chemistry take place, though often it can grow in time.

Songs who pursue a relationship based upon sexual chemistry risk relationship failure when the hormone-induced intoxication subsides and truth hits.

To avoid the Sex Trap, you must balance your heart (and hormonal agents) why not try this out with your head. This indicates combining chemistry with sound judgment. While great sex is very important for a sustainable relationship, you have to make your partner options by paying complete attention to your vision, requirements, objectives, and worths -- while feeling all those amazing sparks!

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